Shell 🐚 inside Vs outside

They never understood my tears so I controlled them.

They never understood my pain so I hid it.

I created a shell and lived inside it because that was a place I felt comfortable and I felt that I could be me and I never let anyone see the shell. It was going fine.
Then things changed, situations changed, I met people who brought me out of my shell without even making me realize it.

But recently I realized how easy it was to get back inside the shell if I let myself.

That which was once my safe space, my go-to place, my comfort zone has become something that I don’t wanna go to again. Once I found comfort in the place outside my shell, I don’t wanna go back.

It’s funny when things, that you wouldn’t have imagined in one point of your life, happen and you don’t think that you’d like it and if given a choice you wouldn’t have chosen it. But Thank God! that you were not given a choice… and Thank God! you’re forced into a situation that you have to adjust and adapt to it and then to your own shock, you do it beautifully which makes you realize that maybe not all unexpected things are bad. Some things push ourselves for us to be better than what we can imagine. We limit ourselves to a boundary. We draw a circle around us and think that this circle is all I can be until something comes up and shows us a whole new view and it broadens our mind and gives us a whole new perspective. And once this happens you never want to go back to who you were. You don’t want to hide anymore. 🙂

Don’t resist change. Accept it. Embrace it. Master it. Then do it all over again. 🙂 

It’ll be uncomfortable everytime, but once you win it, it’s definitely gonna be worth it.

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Adult

At what age did u realize in life that being an adult was mostly pulling yourself together?

I realised it at 23 (now)

And the older you get, the more pulling you gotta do. Show people you have your shit together when you don’t. Pretend as if you’ve figured out everything in your life when you don’t even know where you stand. Keeping a brave face when on the inside you know how much you’re screaming.

Moral of the story: life never gets easier. We get stronger for the next challenge which will again pull us down. We have to overcome that and we become strong enough for the next challenge that is to come and it goes on…………..

Moral of the story 2: don’t give up. Keep fighting. You can win this fight which will make you strong enough to face the next fight

Note to self: Hang in there!

An unexpected gesture

What effect it has! Here we try to be brave and we try to be as strong as we can. We march into the struggle and fight and fight and fight. And we know how much more we have to endure so we keep going. At that point we think we’re so strong and we prepare our minds to be stronger for the incoming things to face. But then someone comes and they change the situation, and your enduring is over. You don’t have to fight anymore. You can relax. They give you that. That unexpected gesture can crumple you when u realize how much you needed that support. In life how many times have u worried about a problem that has disappeared into nothing the next day. You think that’s not gonna happen again. But then it does. You don’t expect it, you don’t ask for it, and when such an unexpected gesture comes you can’t help but believe that there is a greater force out there.

Fly!

Don’t restrict your daughters from going out because it’s unsafe. Teach her self defense and let her explore. Don’t keep her shut in. Let her fly! Or she will live her life feeling helpless and trapped!

Jealous

I see people around me jealous of my life. I can see their eyes wanting to switch places with me. I just wish I was living in the paradise they think I am. It’s exhausting having to hold everything together. Pretending everything is okay. And I’m okay. It’s not their fault they think my life is a paradise. I’ve never had the habit of sharing. What would I share? Half the times I myself don’t know what’s wrong!

Health

Take care of your health.

 

I never cared so much about health. And now I’ve been facing health issues lately and it would have been fine to face the consequences except for the fact that those who care about you will also be in pain. They will try to hide it for your sake. And that just makes it even worse.